ISR Refresher Lessons- Season 3, Week 1

Day 1

After swim eating his cereal bar- Day 1

It is that time of the year when Julian begins his annual ISR lessons again. I already knew it was going to be difficult getting him back in the water since he had been showing some regression (refusing to float and swim to the wall) by the time I tried to get him in the pool in December 2011 (remember I live in Florida).  It was quite a struggle to get him into his swimming trunks with all his crying and refusing to cooperate even before we left the house.  And when we got to the teacher's house he already kept chanting, "I don't want to swim with Ms. Anita!"  Fortunately I got him in the backyard, to the pool and in the water with Ms. Anita.  He worked "at the steps" which was a (bad) crutch for him since he spent majority of the time by the steps whenever he was in the pool. Thankfully he retained his ability to float.So crying, moaning, kicking and screaming on day 1. Funny thing is later that day he said he had so much fun in the pool with Ms. Anita. Here's hoping for a better day tomorrow.

Day 2

My little Nemo before swim lesson- Day 2

Julian sees what outfit waiting for him after his morning potty and he starts moaning. It was his Little Nemo swim outfit my mom bought him 3 years ago (yes, it was a 3T she purchased when he was 1). I got him in it a little easier this morning, bribing him with a Gold Chocolate Coin if he does well. On the way to swim I tried to give a small pep talk incorporating Nemo and his 'bad' fin and the motto 'just keep swimming!'. Hey, you gotta do what works. Today was a little easier getting him back in the water, no crying just moaning. He worked on swimming to the steps and to the wall. His teacher is noticing that he is having a hard time staying horizontal and tend to move vertically. And I have a lot to blame for that since I let him hang out at the steps. But I just didn't know what else to do since he refused to get in the water with me. Oh well. The teacher mentioned maintenance sessions one time per week throughout the year but we will have to see since we are moving. I hope he starts getting the hang of it.

Still wet from swim- Day 3

Day 3
Today was a silent session. Julian refrained from crying, moaning and talking. But he followed directions. He listened when the teacher said to put his arms out front. He listened when she said to swim to the wall. He listened when she said to kick hard (usually). Much improved behavior this lesson. Hope this is going to continue!
Day 4

Earned his chocolate gold coin after a successful swim lesson- Day 4

Today, Julian relearned to count while floating but still needed physical prompt to flip and reach the wall. He allowed his teacher to sit him on the edge and reach the wall as if he fell in. Julian is starting to become more comfortable with Ms. Anita again. He actually smiled today during the lesson. we have moved away from swimming toward the steps since it appears he tends to become more vertical the closer he gets to the wall, as if he is reaching the ground/steps to stand up. He has been trying to swim distances but I can tell he has fear when he swims to the wall. I can see it every time he has to put his head under the water. I wish I could build some confidence in him. Tomorrow is Friday so I can go in the pool with him. Hopefully he will feel more comfortable now that I will be in the water with him.
Day 5

Hesitant before swim- Day 5

You would think that since I got to go in the pool with Julian and his teacher today, there wouldn't be an argument trying to get Jules into the pool. No such luck. BUT, today may have been a turning point. We did a lot of swimming back and forth to mommy and teacher with his teacher trying to teach him to flip and float. He started kicking much better and closing his mouth more with less vertical swimming however he did not flip on his own... When floating or swimming. I do have to say he did pretty well. He even talked more today. But the turning point was after his lesson. A little 3 year old girl named Katie has swim after him and she is one little chatterbox, swimming princess. When he saw her swimming independently, "diving" into the water, laughing and swimming/floating to her mommy, he was amazed. After 3 minutes of watching he told me, "Mommy I want to go in the pool now. I want to do it all by myself!". Mr. 'I-don't-want-anything-to-do-with-the-pool' wanted to jump in the water and swim. So hopefully this is the motivator. He saw how much fun she was having and  didn't realize it could be so much fun. Here's hoping we get through the weekend and return to swim on Tuesday with the same motivation!

House Hunters

I have watched house hunters on HGTV several times and it just seems so nice and simple. The realtor finds 3 prospective homes in their price range and the buyers get to choose in the end which house they like and will put an offer on. Well how simple is that? So not reality! Josh and I have been looking for a home to rent in northern VA since he accepted a new job in the area. We have luckily found a realtor to help us but unfortunately every place that looks Iike a winner online already has applicants and are not actively on the market or end up be a doozy with some modern updates yet old school kitchens/bathrooms. I don't remember it being this difficult to find a house when we were buying but then again that was almost 7 years ago. And I guess its even more difficult when I'm in Florida trying to look at houses online while hubby is trying to make time in his busy schedule at his new job to look at houses 1+ hours away from where he is staying.

So what is on our "want" list? Well this is what our dream rental would include:

1. At least 3 bedrooms with 1800+ sq feet living space
2. Room for ALL our furniture (this includes a living room and a family room; a large master bedroom)
3. Hardwood/laminate flooring
4. Updated kitchen including appliances and countertops/cabinetry
5. 2 Car Garage
6. Deck
7. Fenced backyard
8. No wallpaper/borders
9. Nice/safe neighborhood
10. Easily accessible to the major highways or close to Josh's job
11. Working fireplace
12. Affordable!

Since we will be renting for a long term we hope to find something we are comfortable with for at least 2 years. I hope to find something soon. Once we find a place I can start looking at schools for Julian and then a job for myself.

Let the hunting continue!

Empty

Some people may think that since nothing developed, I shouldn't have any type of remorse.  How can you mourn for something that was never there?  For over 2 weeks, I felt typical symptoms.  I hoped and prayed that I would soon hear the heartbeat of my offspring, to see a circle, a bean growing inside of me.  I kept the secret between a few in hopes of sharing the news to the world with the image of my womb.  But to my utter dismay, the image of emptiness burned a hole in my heart.  All at once, the last two weeks began to feel as empty as what I saw on the screen.  My empty promises to my son that he was going to be a big brother.  The empty plans that left me to wonder what I will do next.  The emptiness that will never be filled with the one who never had a chance in this world.  Who knew you could cry for someone that was never someone?

Today, the remains of what was suppose-to-be have been removed so that my body can start to heal and begin the cycle again. But what has been removed, will always have a place in my heart.  And all I can do is continue to pick up the pieces and keep hoping and praying.