Someone at work recently referred to this line from the Rolling Stones- "You can't always get what you want."
I felt it was a pretty appropriate title.
It is Day 30 of Cycle 3 . My husband and I have been trying to conceive our 2nd child for the past few months. I have to admit I thought it would be so easy. When we conceived our 1st, it worked the 1st cycle, no problems. I tried to time it so that I would benefit with my disability insurance as well as my summer break. The first couple failed cycles I felt utterly disappointed. I couldn't imagine, going through this type of feat every single month. I honestly couldn't believe with all my calcuating and charting that I was unable to conceive during my fertile period. All these thoughts kept running through my head: I want to expand my family. I want Julian to have a sibling. I want to feel the exhilaration of having a little being growing inside of me. I want to have that motherly connection. But now it appears that God has other plans for us. I was a bit embarrassed to even share this because I know there are women, even girls, out there that are so fertile that they could conceive every cycle. There are those out there who can make babies like it's their job. There are those out there who make babies and aren't even planning on it. But I know there are women out there who are in the same boat as me... and even those who are worse off.
Now that I am coming to the end of my 3rd cycle without the intended outcome, I don't feel so distraught. I use to be all gung-ho on this fertility program, but I'm not sure if it really is the right time anymore. The next few months I'm going to "defocus" on getting pregnant and focus on enjoying the events that are coming ahead (like the family cruise and Food & Wine Festival). I am going to get myself mentally, physically, and financially in-check. It's time to get self fish. I'm sure if the time is right, it'll happen.
I felt it was a pretty appropriate title.
It is Day 30 of Cycle 3 . My husband and I have been trying to conceive our 2nd child for the past few months. I have to admit I thought it would be so easy. When we conceived our 1st, it worked the 1st cycle, no problems. I tried to time it so that I would benefit with my disability insurance as well as my summer break. The first couple failed cycles I felt utterly disappointed. I couldn't imagine, going through this type of feat every single month. I honestly couldn't believe with all my calcuating and charting that I was unable to conceive during my fertile period. All these thoughts kept running through my head: I want to expand my family. I want Julian to have a sibling. I want to feel the exhilaration of having a little being growing inside of me. I want to have that motherly connection. But now it appears that God has other plans for us. I was a bit embarrassed to even share this because I know there are women, even girls, out there that are so fertile that they could conceive every cycle. There are those out there who can make babies like it's their job. There are those out there who make babies and aren't even planning on it. But I know there are women out there who are in the same boat as me... and even those who are worse off.
Now that I am coming to the end of my 3rd cycle without the intended outcome, I don't feel so distraught. I use to be all gung-ho on this fertility program, but I'm not sure if it really is the right time anymore. The next few months I'm going to "defocus" on getting pregnant and focus on enjoying the events that are coming ahead (like the family cruise and Food & Wine Festival). I am going to get myself mentally, physically, and financially in-check. It's time to get self fish. I'm sure if the time is right, it'll happen.
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